I'm not an apologist for anyone's bad behavior, but I noticed your picture of Michael Douglas and the statement that he cheated on his wife, Diandra, with his now wife, Catherine Zeta-Jones.
Douglas was separated from his wife before he began his relationship with Jones. His 23-year marriage was fraught with many separations and problems, not the least of which was his philandering. She brought many problems to the marriage as well. That being said, he did not "cheat" with Zeta-Jones.

cheating happens when there is lack of confidence,lack of self respect & respect for their partner,cheating act is an animal instinct act & not real love...
cheating is a cowered way of getting to know yourself and your partner..
must learn to be honest with yourself , emotion , absolutely no lies to your self and your partner...
marriage is very hard always spend time to understand each others feeling..we all need a little attention here and there..
the bad thing about it if there are any childern in the pix, & see their parents behavior & out come of it .. perhaps a bitter divorce and separation.. we are showing them you do not have to work on your behavior .
on the last note. i also consider cheating on spouse is a form of emotional abuse, a bad scar in ones life.

Cheating on a longtime spouse just doesn't 'happen'; a man or woman doesn't just 'wake up' one day and 'decide' to have an affair or to go outside the marriage for sex or closeness with someone else. As for who is to 'blame', both partners always carry some of the responsibility for the breakdown in communication that caused their needs to be neglected. A new partner outside of the marriage is a thrill, it's someone NEW, they are INTERESTED in you, they LISTEN to you, they CARE about you, and the ego boost you get from this is impossibly magnetic in many cases. Also, many women (and men as well) have hearts that are crying out to be noticed, appreciated, acknowledged, and loved - just for who they are, not necessarily for what they do in the marriage. For men, neglect often manifests itself in an affair, because men equate sex with love - and the attention they receive from a 'new' woman, someone who is 'interested' in them, is IRRESISTIBLE. Many times the new woman is less attractive than the wife at home, but she's INTERESTED in them! Surviving infidelity is never easy, but it can be done IF both partners are willing and able to recommit to the primary relationship and put it before everything else in life, including children, jobs, and the rest of the mundane things that sidetracked it in the first place.
Remember, the most important relationship you have, after the ones with yourself and your God, is the one with your partner - not your children, they grow up and LEAVE YOU eventually. Not your friends, they also come and go. Not your job, it's just how you earn a living, not your LIFE.
If more women would remember to put their primary relationship FIRST, and work diligently to do this, there would be far fewer men cheating, even on FOF's. It's not an age-related problem; it's an INTIMACY problem.
I know - I've been on both sides of this over the years. I've been the 'wife', and I've been the 'other woman' - and there is ALWAYS a reason within the PRIMARY RELATIONSHIP that leads to infidelity.
Look WITHIN before you place blame - on the other woman or on your partner. Within the relationship you'll find your answer...

I've seen what cheating does to others and am just thankful that it hasn't happened to me. I would never think of cheating on my husband.

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. Just make sure it isn't AstroTurf.

I understand the philosphy of forgiving and letting go, however my experience with cheaters is that they will defintely cheat again - it almost like they can't help themselves and they feel horrible afterwards. This doesn't make up for the fact that they cheat and I personally find it difficult to forget let along forgive

because they can or because their fathers did or because our fathers did (we tend to marry our fathers).

Cheating happens when needs are not met. A couple who share mutual respect can talk things through and get at the root of any discomforts they might have, then find solutions. Both are willing if that respect for one another is strong and genuine.

these below are all excellent comments & I appreciate your thoughts very much.

I have been a cheater. It was exciting, dangerous and fun. No denying it, but I married (the 1st time) right out of high school at my parents strong request and against my better judgement because he was a deadbeat (did I say I was 18 yrs old), not an excuse, just an explanation. I'm on my 2nd marriage, w/2 children and a husband who cheated on me (karma), not good on the receiving end. I feel more emotionally unstable that when I was 18, I know I can and will survive, but I can't bring myself to leave because of the children.

I just would like to applaud the candid nature of both the writers of these articles centered around sexual encounter outside of the bonds of matrimony as well as those with the courage and tenacity to not only state their opinions, but also the willingness to share their personal experiences at the risk of personal vulnerability - however anonymous they may be (or think they may be). I feel that humans possess an enormous duplicity when it comes to their nature. We ARE, after all, undoubtedly biologically driven in that in our primal, animal-like instincts & behavior toward sex is inherent, with the desired end result of proliferating the species with the most ideal genetics - strong, competent offspring. The duplicity occurs due to our ability not only to be cognizant of our emotions, but analyze & rationalize them. And try as we may to remain objective, our current culture, including most organized religions, has successfully coupled sex with an underlying current of guilt & shame. I am impressed by some of the polar opposite comments having been stated, as it reinforces the notion that we are all individuals, thus the attitudes and opinions should so reflect.
In simpler terms: 'different strokes for different folks'... (oh, & no pun intended). I thank everyone for having shared their own particular feelings. And I also doubly thank those who do not attempt to shove their personal dogma down anyone else's throats!