Pay It Along

“I love to give my friends money as gifts,” Barbara told me during our interview for FabOverFifty.  When I asked why,  she answered, “because I like to.”  Another woman is paying for the college tuition of her manicurist’s daughter. “As long as she does well in school, I will continue,” she told me. On the approach of my 50th birthday, I took one of my best friend’s to Paris for a long weekend.


“We were jealous and looking over our shoulders in our twenties. We’re generous in our fifties,” said Robin, whose sentiments pretty much capture the attitude of the majority of FOF women. It doesn’t appear that we suddenly switch gears once we reach the fifty-year mark, but we learn over the years how rewarding it is to be generous to others.  We’re not just generous financially, but emotionally and spiritually. We look after our aging parents and give succor to our ailing friends. We mentor younger women at work and contribute time and effort to our communities and heartfelt causes. We love to share the things we love, whether it’s the name of our yoga instructor, favorite shop or dermatologist.

Not to sound sappy and self-serving, but we are a fabulous group.

The Mating Game

Smooching is Sensational
Smooching is Sensational

I’ve spent the last six months interviewing about 100 Fab Over Fifty women from coast to coast—aged 50 to 75—and some interesting commonalities about marriage have emerged from my stimulating conversations with them.


Those women who are married to their original husbands are among the happiest women I’ve ever met.  Their husbands are their best friends, their biggest supporters and their lovers.  They haven’t stayed married for convenience but because marriage has been one of the most wonderful experiences of their lives.


The divorced women who haven’t remarried, as well as those who have never married, adore living solo. Although a number of divorced women wouldn’t mind sharing their lives with a new man, they don’t sit around moping and waiting for Prince Charming. They have their work and passions, their families and friends, their homes and secret hideaways. They say they will be just fine without a man. Those who have never married feel exactly the same.


The women who’ve remarried are thrilled with their new husbands. “I finally found my soul mate,” said one who is in her third marriage.  “We don’t like to be away from each other,” another told me.  They sound like young girls when they talk about the men in their lives.

I didn’t talk to one single woman who said she’s unhappy with her marriage. Thank goodness, most of us have figured out what we want by the time we’re fifty.