My Husband Was A Sex Addict!

Charlotte is as pretty as her name. She’s in her early fifties, and was born abroad, although her slight accent doesn’t give away where. She married a man from another continent, decades her senior, and they raised their son in the United States, where they launched a successful business together. Charlotte was his third wife.

Anyone meeting them would swear she was the love of this man’s life. And, were it not for his sexual addiction, she might very well have been.

Even after Charlotte found out about her husband’s wandering ways, and he vowed they were over, he continued to betray her trust. She had enough when he claimed he was on yet another business trip, but she heard him greet his lover in the hotel room (he accidentally left his cell phone on after he and Charlotte talked.) She was sad, but she wasn’t surprised. (more…)

The Conversation You Should Have With Your Gynecologist

Bet you and your gynecologist have NEVER had a conversation like this! Take a few minutes out of your day to hear what Dr. Alyssa Dweck and Geri are discussing.

BUTTONto start acting on Dr. Dweck’s wise advise. If you enter code 5AFOF4, you’ll even get $50 off the product she loves, valid through 8/31/16.

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How To Play ‘Spin The Bottle’ After 50

I was asked to participate in the #KYconfessionals campaign, sponsored by K-Y Brand and Walgreens. Although I have been compensated, all opinions are my own.

Invoking the name of my former lover, Edgar (1988-2000), comes in handy when I’m about to write a blog about sex, because my sexual experiences with him were o-u-t-of-t-h-i-s-w-o-r-l-d!

Sex on the magnificent beach in Longboat Key, Florida. Sex on the plush carpet of his opulent executive office in Connecticut. Sex in his high-end Lincoln Town Car (before it became a car service car). Sex in the oversized jacuzzi tub. We not only had sex all over the place; no place on each of our bodies was off limits!

Well, that was then and this is now. I’m almost 16 years older and intimacy and sex have become routine, as in ordinary.

So, I have two choices: 1) Accept ordinary or 2) Figure out a way to turn ordinary into extraordinary. Interestingly, more and more companies are creating products and devices to help me make the second option possible, a response to a sexual revolution in America today. (more…)

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How Fiera Is Improving My Post-50 Sex Life

I’m discovering that women, 50+, pretty much fall into two groups: Those who don’t dare talk about their weight, age, sex life, and whether they’ve had fillers or plastic surgery on their faces.  And those who do!

I’m pretty certain that the women in the first group believe others will think less of them if they reveal they’re 58, let’s say; weigh in at 161.4 pounds; lost much of their libido, and had liposuction on their jowls. Of course, I respect how they feel, even if my attitude is wildly different. Let me be perfectly clear: I’m not thrilled about my age (68); my weight (I don’t weigh myself, but I’ve revealed my belly online so you know I’m not 127 pounds); my decreased sex drive, or my sagging skin. And even if I can’t do a darn thing about my age, I do try my darndest to mitigate the effects of aging. If you read my blog, you know my story: Diet, exercise, top-notch skin care, hairpiece, and yes, jowl reduction.  

Sex is one area where I hadn’t exerted much effort. After I stopped taking estrogen, about seven years ago, my libido started declining. Although I wasn’t mourning the loss of sex drive, I wouldn’t have minded getting it back. I was consumed with creating FabOverFifty, however, beginning around the same time I stopped taking estrogen. So my libido took a back seat. (more…)

When Did You Have The Greatest Sex Of Your Life?

I’ve been learning some interesting facts about the sexual habits of women over 50 from the polls we started taking on FabOverFifty during the last couple of months. One of the numbers that jumps out is that 40 percent of us have sex with a partner fewer than four times a year.

Although the poll didn’t ask whether women care about their limited sexual experiences with partners, I would venture to guess that they don’t care much. As one 60+ woman told me a few years ago, “If my husband died, I wouldn’t mind if I never had sex again.”

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This Wouldn’t Have Played Well in the 1950s!

The back of the program for the play Sex Tips for
Straight Women from a Gay Man
invites us to
Throw a Sex Tips Party.

“Packages available for bachelorettes, birthdays, girls and guys night out, and more…” Judging by the enthusiastic reaction to the frothy little show from the young couples and singles in the audience, the suggestion is dead nuts on. (I guess I just made a pun!)

Sex Tips, based on the book of the same name, tells the story of Robyn, a Manhattan community college professor, assigned to lead a book discussion with Dan, an “alternative author of the modern era” and a sex adviser. Of course, Robyn (a.k.a. Straight Woman) could take a few pointers herself from Dan’s (a.k.a. Gay Man) compendium of sex tips. The third participant is the college’s (straight) sound and lighting guy, who also doubles an object of desire.

Members of the audience embarrassingly—and then enthusiastically—participate in a few games, including one called Name That Penis. Not surprisingly, the jokes involve subjects including dildos and ejaculation.

Billed as “a romantic comedy, with
,” it’s all in good fun.

Click here to find out more about Sex Tips
and purchase tickets today!

I’m Ready To Admit This Publicly!

OK, I’m going to get this over with, before I hesitate a moment: Masturbating has a great deal going for it!

I’ve had a long history with the activity, and although I’ve never included it on my resume as one of my hobbies (“an activity done regularly in one’s leisure time for pleasure,” according to Google definitions), I guess I could classify it as a part-time interest. It’s one of those pastimes that can give me great pleasure, without relying on anyone else, although I have done it alongside someone else, which can be quite enjoyable, too. Oh, I almost forgot, you can enlist another player to stand in for you, but unless he or she knows the right moves, you’re better off going it alone.

Like many activities that run into big bucks, given all the paraphernalia you need (think skiing, scuba diving, painting), this one doesn’t require a single thing you don’t own. Expensive permits or certification classes aren’t required, either. However, there is one small piece of equipment I’d strongly urge other masturbators to consider, that can give this activity to a whole new dimension: A vibrator.


If you’re one of the older boomers, like I am, you might have believed all these years that nice, respectable girls didn’t use vibrators. And you might have a long-time partner who also doesn’t know the ins and outs of vibrators (excuse the pun, couldn’t help myself). But you can trust me on this one: If handled adroitly, a vibrator can become an extension of yourself. It can perform when you’re tired; be charged up and ready to go at a moment’s notice, without prodding or cajoling, and will respond to your every command. Now tell me, what man does that?

You must choose your vibrator carefully, however. Like anything else, all vibrators are definitely not created equal.

Many sound like jackhammers; run out of steam before you can get steamed up; are so cheaply made, they fall apart after a few months of activity, and do their job haltingly, clumsily and impotently. In these cases, you’re better off masturbating without one.

I’ve tried more than a few vibrators since making their acquaintance around 12 years ago, (I sometimes think of all the fun I missed all those years before we met), but even when I fell in love with one right from the start, the affair didn’t last long. So when the folks at Revel Body asked if I’d try their new Revel Body SOL Sonic Vibrator, I was game.

“We think of these as lifestyle products to enhance sexual well-being, not as sex toys.”

—Robin Elenga, Revel Body CEO


Hands down (another of those crazy little puns!), this is the best vibrator I’ve ever used. Without getting into boring, hard-to-understand, technical information on what makes it such a cool operator, let me describe it this way:

The cute little round device has a magnetically centered moving part, powered up by quick, alternating magnetic pulses created by a patented Revel Body technology. Unlike traditional battery-powered vibrators, with limited speeds, this unit sits on a stand, which charges the lithium-powered battery, and delivers a wide range of adjustable vibration “never before seen in sexual wellness products,” according to the company. Making that even clearer, the powerful vibrations provide superior stimulation to the sensitive part of your body, referred to by others (never us) as the clitoris. Said even more succinctly: This thing makes you feel great!

The tube-shaped magnetic center can easily be popped out when you want to change one of the three tips, colored deep pink and funnily called Rose, Fawn and Ever. Each tip is shaped differently, to create a unique sensation when glided upon the clitoris (there, I said it). Experimenting is the best way to find the tip that works best on and for you! The technology also reportedly reduces vibration to the hand by 80 percent, and the ergonomic shape makes it feel comfortable and easy to use.


“Revel Body SOL is the only vibrator that can operate at the frequency of the OM tuning fork (136.1 Hertz), used to tune the instruments for Indian temple music. It is called Sadja, or Sa, the base tone of the Sitar and Tambura, and is said to be good for meditation, sexual awakening, deepening intimacy, reducing stress and renewing your mind, body and spirit,” said Robin Elenga, Revel Body CEO.

Made of high-quality, body-safe materials, the Revel Body SOL is waterproof, rechargeable, and is pretty enough to leave on your nightstand. Vibrators that are shaped like penises generally don’t perform like the real goods and you can’t wait to stash them away.

Another great feature of the Revel Body SOL is that it generates underwater vibration and suction when the concave side is used underwater and held again the body. It is a sensation unlike any other. I see lots of baths in my future.

One more thing: The $139 investment is nothing, considering the return. I’d pay twice as much for this, even if I had to give up drinking cappuccino for a couple of weeks. Those can be stimulating, too, but they don’t come close to this.