That’s NOT Where I Wanted To Be Thin!

I assume I’m no different than most women
when it comes to my hair: I’ve had a schizophrenic relationship with it for my entire life (at least
for as long as I remember).

I’ve worn it super short, like Mia Farrow in Rosemary’s Baby.

I let it grow till it reached past my shoulders.
Loathing my endless kinks and ringlets, I subjected them to a Japanese straightening.
Sick and tired of blowing it straight, I let it go crazy curly.

I couldn’t wait to cut bangs, then couldn’t wait till they grew in.
I teased it silly for years and then wore it flat as a pancake.
I cajoled it into a twist and twisted it with rollers.

I tried beehives and braids; flips and pageboys.
I sprayed it until it wouldn’t move, greased it, conditioned, and masked it.

It’s a miracle my hair didn’t decide to leave my head years ago, fed up with my endless abuse!

Alas, it finally started deserting me a few years ago, and, as it became sparser and sparser, there was less and less I could do with it. No matter how I had it colored, cut and styled, it was a bad hair day. A really bad hair day. My bad hair days turned into bad hair weeks, bad hair months, and, finally, bad hair forever.

When an email popped up inviting me to an event at a salon called LeMetric, which specializes in creating custom pieces made of real hair, I knew someone from up high was sending me a message: GET ONE OF THOSE PIECES!

It’s about three years later, and I’m on my second piece. When I used to get compliments on my hair, I’d have no hesitation telling the complimenters that it wasn’t actually my hair, that it was a hairpiece. I stopped that routine a while ago. It IS my hair. I OWN it, literally and figuratively.

Now, here’s my question to all the ladies out there who have thinning hair, but don’t do a thing about it: WHY?????

• Do you think your thinning hair is attractive? Sexy? The way to “age gracefully?’
• Have you given up caring about your hair entirely?
• Do you think people will “know” you’re wearing a hairpiece and you’ll be embarrassed?
• Do you think it will be too much trouble to maintain a hairpiece?
• Do you think a hairpiece will be too expensive?
• Do you think that if you admit your hair is thinning, your life as you knew it will be over?

Last week, I sent an email to members of the FabOverFifty community in New York, New Jersey and Connecticut, inviting those with thinning hair to send us photos to be entered into a contest to win one of LeMetric’s wonderful, new HairyPop-ins, which will cover up thinning hair at the crown, on top or will lengthen your hair.

Although almost 20 percent of the recipients opened the email (a really good open rate), WE DIDN’T RECEIVE A SINGLE PHOTO.

Elline Surianello, the owner of LeMetric, who has become one of my dearest friends, and I are completely baffled why not a single woman will admit she has thinning hair. Surely, at least a handful of the women who opened the email have thinning hair since it’s pretty common after menopause.

Whenever I ride the New York City subways and busses, I see countless women with noticeably thinning hair. Their (thin) hair is usually nicely colored and styled, and they are dressed well, but I can’t help but say to myself: “Don’t you SEE that your hair isn’t attractive!!!!” Frankly, I think they’d look better shaving their entire heads.

To those of you with thinning hair, PLEASE DON’T GET ANGRY at me because I don’t think thinning hair
is attractive (whether you’re 30 or 60). I just sincerely want to know what you think about it.

One of my relatives has had thinning hair since she was a young women, and although she had the means to buy the best hairpiece in town, she never did. She’s quite pretty, and really smart, but her hair didn’t do her any favors. She finally said she should do something about it. I haven’t seen her in a while, so I don’t know if she did.