Why One Doctor Says “Never Again” To Warming Lubricants

This post is sponsored by Pulse, the most exquisite lubes on the market

What one thing could you invite into the bedroom to improve your sex life? Okay, you don’t have to share every fantasy, but hopefully something special did cross your mind: a great lubricant.

We chatted with Lauren Streicher, MD, a Clinical Professor of Obstetrics and Gynecology and the Medical Director of Northwestern Medicine Center for Sexual Medicine and Menopause for her expert advice about how to find a safe, effective lube among the many, many choices. While she’s quick to recommend lubes to her patients if they’re struggling with dryness or simply want to improve the quality of their sex lives, she acknowledges that there’s a lot of misinformation out there, especially when it comes to warming lubes and the best body-friendly ingredients. Let’s put some lube myths to bed before you yourself slide into the sheets.

First of all, how do you know if you need to use lube?

If the phrase “sandpaper sex” makes you squirm, it should. Vaginal dryness can lead to irritation and painful intercourse, and it can be a challenge to resolve without a little extra help. According to Dr. Streicher, there are several reasons someone might need supplementary lubrication; hormonal changes, certain medical conditions, and medications can all increase dryness and affect the body’s ability to produce enough natural lubrication. On the other hand, even people who don’t struggle with dryness can enjoy using lube to enhance their sexual activities—it can be used during foreplay, with toys, or with a partner during intercourse. Essentially, if your goal is to increase comfort, ease, and pleasure, a good lube can help in more ways than one.

Lube is slippery, for one thing, and more slip means more stimulation—the fun kind of friction. With that comes more warmth and increased blood flow, which you definitely want; it helps relax tissues, heighten arousal, and improve sensation during sex.

What’s all this about warming lubes?

At first blush, the water-based warming lubes on the market do sound like a pretty enticing innovation. After all, if warmth is the gateway to more enjoyable sex, it makes sense that you’d want a warming lube. They do boast right on the label that they increase sensation and maximize pleasure, and the millions of marketing dollars behind those claims have made them hard to ignore. 

Unfortunately, the advertisements can be misleading. Dr. Streicher cautions that there’s a real difference between a warming lube, and a lube that is warm. Warming lubes are formulated with the assumption that sensation is synonymous with heat (think of certain medicated ointments for sore muscles and you’ll start to see where we’re going with this). During her research about effective lubrication ingredients, Dr. Streicher learned that these lubes actually get their warming qualities from additives that create an intensely stimulating sensation more like a chemical burn than pleasant physical warmth. A number of these additives include mentholated ingredients, compounds derived from red peppers, and chemicals that can cause major tissue dehydration. People looking to spice things up with one of these warming lubricants can get more than they bargained for; Dr. Streicher says some patients report stinging, irritation, and redness after using warming lube—a whole host of discomforts that can ruin the mood.

It’s not just the warming additives that can be irritating. Water-based lubes (as opposed to silicone-based) can also include chemical preservatives like glycerin and propylene glycol. Although common in many skincare and beauty products, these ingredients may be sensitizing to some people and can contribute to dry, dehydrated tissues and seriously uncomfortable sex.

If you can’t stand the heat…find a better lubricant:

Those millions of marketing dollars we mentioned? The ones telling you that their warming lube can make all of your wildest dreams come true? There’s nothing in the budget for educating customers about what’s really in those formulas. In our conversation, Dr. Streicher stressed repeatedly how important it is for people to get savvy about these ingredients, the harm they can do and how they can affect your vagina. As she points out, your comfort is worth the effort it takes to read the label before you use something on your most sensitive body parts.

Also, just because you now know the truth about warming lubes doesn’t mean you have to forgo that soothing warmth—simply make sure you warm your lube (silicone or water-based) manually. Dr. Streicher keeps a Pulse Warming Dispenser in her office to show patients how easy and hygienic it is to use. They’re happy to have an alternative that won’t cause irritation or
interrupt the action one bit, since it can sit right within reach on the bedside table.

How to decide which lube is right for you:

If you’re ready to toss your old lube after scrutinizing the ingredients, Dr. Streicher recommends choosing your next one based on how you plan to use it. Is your rendezvous going to be with a penis, or a toy? In the shower? With a condom? Your sexual activity may determine which kind of lube will work best for you (but hey, it never hurts to experiment!).

Silicone for sex with a penis:

Silicone lubes, like Pulse’s Aloe-ahh, are ideal when you want something supremely slippery, long-lasting, and compatible with condoms. Because they don’t include those sensitizing additives or harmful chemicals and don’t absorb into the tissues, they’re far less likely to cause an unpleasant reaction.

Water-based for condoms and toys:

Water-based lubes are easy to find and compatible with both condoms and toys (skip silicone lubes with silicone toys because they can compromise the material–another sex science tip to keep in your nightstand). Prioritize finding a pH-balanced water-based lube and avoid ingredients like propylene glycol and glycerine, which can cause dehydration.

Why you need to be in-the-know about natural ingredients:

If you’re wondering whether your lube needs to be chock-full of natural and organic ingredients, Dr. Streicher encourages researching what that really means. Just because an ingredient is natural and organic doesn’t mean it belongs in your vagina–think of those red pepper extracts, for instance! Natural fragrances and essential oils can also irritate sensitive tissues, even though they’re derived from plants and as natural as they come. On the other hand, there’s nothing organic about silicone, and it makes for a truly terrific lubricant. Whether your lube is synthetic or natural or botanical or made in a factory, as long as you prioritize ingredients that are safe, gentle, and effective, your vagina will thank you.

Why Pulse made the gynecologist-approved list:

Dr. Streicher keeps a short list of lubricants to share with patients who are struggling with dryness or just curious about adding lube to their bedroom routine, and she confirms that our Pulse Pods are a hit. While soothing water-based lubes can be hard to find, Dr. Streicher saved particular praise for our long-lasting H2Oh! formula, thanks to the pure chia extract that makes it super hydrating and non-sticky. For those who aren’t sure what to choose, either of Pulse’s lubes, Aloe-ahh or H2Oh! are a great choice whether you’re a “lube newbie” or not.

You shouldn’t be turned off by lube just because that bottle of Warming Jelly you bought last month now sounds too hot to handle. If something works–if it’s slippery, long-lasting, and doesn’t irritate you during or after sex, by all means, use what you enjoy with your partner or a toy. But if you’re looking for a superior sexual experience and want to prioritize a really good, safe, effective lube, take all of this information with you on your next shopping trip, because your pleasure is absolutely worth it. And remember: warm your lube, don’t let your lube “warm” you.

Lauren Streicher, MD, is the Medical Director of Northwestern Medicine Center for Sexual Medicine and Menopause.

For a limited time only, Pulse is offering Fab Over Fifty readers personal lubricant samples for only $1

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This post is sponsored by Pulse

Unsurprising Fact #1:  78 percent of us use lubes before having sex, according to an exclusive FabOverFifty survey of 75 women.

Surprising Fact #2: 57 percent of us don’t know the ingredients in our lubes.

Unfortunate Fact #3: The ingredients in the best-selling lubes in the United States can harm our delicate vaginal tissue (which becomes even more delicate as we age!)  Many lubes actually dehydrate our already dry tissues, when we erroneously think they’re hydrating the tissues. Not to mention, they’re sticky, icky, gummy and gooey!

Happy Fact #4: 500 lucky FOFs* will have the chance to try a new lube from Pulse.  It’s absolutely the silkiest, smoothest, most sensual and spa-like lube in the land. And, it’s completely safe and hypoallergenic.

One lucky FOF also will win the sleek-looking, seductively lit Pulse Personal Lubricant Warming Dispenser, valued at $199, which delivers a deliciously warm lube right into the palm of your hand. 

The Pulse Promise

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Don’t be Coy. Grab a Toy!

This post is sponsored by Adam & Eve

Ladies, if you’ve never used a sex toy, it’s unequivocally not too late to start.  This is not the 1970s or 80s, and you don’t even need a partner to give you pleasure. What’s more, you can choose a toy that will do just what you want, exactly where you want it. You’re in control, no questions asked.  Any women who uses toys, with or without a teammate, will attest to what I’m saying.

And how easy it is to order your toys right on the internet, in the privacy of your own home! So, even if you’re timid about making the move, only you know you’re making it. Adam & Eve, appropriately named after the lovers in the Garden of Eden, is the leading sex toy company in the United States. It has been selling adult toys–and other products including lingerie and lubes–for almost 50 years, and has built a reputation for honesty and reliability.

“Our loyal customers know they can rely on us to treat them fairly, protect their privacy, and stand by our promises,” reads a statement on adamandeve.com. The company also offers 24/7 customer service.  You can call or email them anytime. Plus, you’ll get a 90-day money back guarantee, so if you’re not satisfied (excuse the pun) with the products you ordered, for any reason, Adam & Eve will take it back.  Again, no questions asked.

                                               oxo Geri

Four of Our FOFavorite Toys

A Magic Wand

“Our first venture has proven to be quite enjoyable for both of us! It has opened the door to new experiences for an older couple. Highly recommended.” — 5-star review

Sensual Touch Massager proves the adage that “good things come in small packages.” It may be petite and lightweight, but this wand is ultra-powerful, capable of delivering 10 body-shaking vibration functions.  And, it’s rechargeable, so wires never get in the way of your ultimate fulfillment. The curvy, mushroom-shaped silicone head provides full coverage and feel silky smooth against your sensitive skin.

Surround Sound

“This is a very versatile toy both for me and my wife. It works well for both of us together or solo. Nice that is has different speed and pulse settings. Very fun toy. Great battery life, easy to charge. Easy to clean. Well made.”–5-star reviewer

Just like the reviewer said, Tryst Multi-Erogenous Massager is a magnificent multi-tasker, performing  as a penis ring, clitoral stimulator, couples vibrator, and more! Its unique arms and triple motor system can arouse any area with seven vibrating, pulsating and escalating functions. Play with it alone or with your partner, for endless exciting experiences.  Tryst is rechargeable and features a smooth silicone surface.

Pretty And Powerful

“If I could give it 10 stars, I would.  I was really hesitant to buy, but I’m really glad that I did. Small, discrete, and gets the job done. I love that it has different functions and that it’s waterproof. Also feel like it’s convenient that it’s rechargeable vs. battery operated!”–5-star reviewer

The Luxe Princess Vibrator is beautiful outside and works like a charm inside. Its diamond-textured silicone surface and seven vibration functions will bring you over-the-top sensations. Rechargeable and, at four inches, just the right size for working its way into tight spots. Quiet and waterproof, too. Comes in a lovely satin storage pouch. Give yourself a gift or get one for your best friend.  

Its Name Says It All

“My wife is very difficult to O, so I was leary about spending so much on one product. But I surprised her with this vibe, and when she relented to try it (she had thought that for her it was a waste of money), I could tell she enjoyed it quickly. Then, for someone who mostly doesn’t get any pleasure from other vibes, she was clutching the sheets within five minutes.” 5-star reviewer 

Strong and mischievously curvy to match your body’s natural curves, the Evolved Wild Orchid Vibrator has one motor in the tip of the smooth silicone shaft to target your G-Spot, and another in the flexible clitoral stimulator. Offering eight vibration functions, including pulsation and escalation, the motors can be used separately or together to create up to 24 unique combinations. Rechargeable and waterproof for wet and wild times.

Adam & Eve is offering the FOF community a generous 50% off 1 item + Free Shipping on your entire order in the US & Canada. (*some exclusions apply). Enter code FAB at checkout.


                   Adam & Eve today. 

Satisfaction guaranteed!


For the Love of Lube

In partnership with Pulse 

What’s your lube of choice, and does it really satisfy you? Please take our (anonymous) lube survey so you can see how your FOF sisters love with lube.


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The Pulse to Get Your Pulse Racing

My partner and I are canoodling in bed, and we’re both in the mood for more. I call a timeout as I fiddle around in my nightstand drawer for the tube of lubricant.  By the time I unscrew the goop-rimmed cap, squeeze out the cold gel, and slather it on, the mood is gone! I despise that lube, and every other lube I’ve ever bought, but I need it. I absolutely need it.  

Nothing can throw cold water on a romantic interlude like the lubricants on the market. Cold buzz kill!  Definitely not sexy.

Okay, now try to imagine the same bedroom scene, only this time I can slip my arm over to a sleek-looking, seductively lit device sitting on my nightstand, and with a wave of a hand (I don’t even have to look) out comes a deliciously warm lube right into my palm. I rub it on, my pulse speeds up, and I’m more in the mood for love!

Ladies, if the first scenario sounds familiar, and the second sounds alluring, meet the Pulse your pulse has been waiting for: The Pulse Personal Lubricant Warming Dispenser. Simply pop a little Pulse Pod filled with healthy and soothing personal lubricant into the chic and modern device (think Apple-like design meets Nespresso coffee capsules), and it delivers warm, comforting servings of luxurious lube in a touchless, mess-free and hygienic way–on demand, when I want them. Engineering at its most elegant. Just fabulous! (more…)

Increase Your Libido, Starting Today!

This message is sponsored by Fiera, but all opinions are those of FabOverFifty!

Fiera® has been all the rage with women who want to assure their sexual health after menopause.

A small, hands-free personal care device that increases libido and enhances arousal, Fiera is like no other tool to help you reconnect with your partner. It’s comfortable, easy to handle, and a game-changer for women who want to recharge their relationships naturally and effectively.


How To Make 2017 Your Sexiest Year Yet

Isn’t it about time you tried something new in the bedroom?

We’re continually excited about the intimate lifestyle products from LELO, because once you start using them, you’ll may never want to leave the bedroom! Check out the the three pleasure sets below, and see which ones are available at wonderful savings, up to 44% off.


So, why wait! Start the New Year with a New Approach to Sex. (more…)

Re-Discover Your Sex Drive, Naturally

Jumpstart your sex life this holiday season.


We’ve been in love with Fiera for quite some time, and we’re back today to give away three of these sensational personal care devices.

productsFiera ($199) is like no other tool to enhance intimacy. A small, hands-free product. Fiera enhances arousal and increases libido, helping get your mind and body in the mood for sex with your loved one. (more…)

Set Your Sights On Six Sexy Black Friday & Cyber Monday Specials!

It’s always the right time to try something new in the bedroom.

And, you can get started now by taking advantage of amazing Black Friday specials (up to 70% off bestselling items) from LELO, the world leader in luxury intimate lifestyle products. So surprise your partners (and close friends) with some extra-special gifts! Here are six of our favorites, but don’t forget to visit LELO.com to view all the great buys.


Bridal Pleasure Set
($65.70, regularly $219)

Perfect for any bride, or an adventurous girlfriend, this set includes a waterproof NOA massager, Silk Pearl blindfold, and pearl-studded teaser whip. Just because the products are all white doesn’t mean to have to be angelic!


ORA 2 ($141.75, regularly $189)

Simulating his tongue during oral sex, this award-winning device will help you reach orgasm before, during, or after intercourse. Use it with your man, or alone. Featuring 10 stimulation patterns that surge when pressed against the skin, it’ll be the tool you’ll never want to put away.

“The newly enhanced pleasure nub rotates and vibrates, like a tongue, but better. And, the SenseTouch technology increases the intensity of the vibrations as more pressure is applied,” says LELO.

($132.30, regularly $189)

You and your man will love PINO because it will encourage his erection, and keep it harder than ever, while the upper portion rubs against you for clitoral stimulation. “It feels so great on the skin, and my lady loves when I massage her with it during foreplay. It has really upped our love-making experience,” says Brandon.

Keep Reading…


How To Choose The Right Vibrator

As we age, our libidos and sex lives come under attack from physical and emotional forces, including weight gain, hormonal fluctuations, illnesses, changes after surgeries and medications. It just may be time to bring a new “pal” into the bedroom to help reignite your passions.

FabOverFifty has partnered with LELO, the world leader in intimate lifestyle products, to showcase five of its bestselling luxury toys that can bring you renewed excitement, whether you’re solo or have a partner. Happily, masturbation is no longer a “dirty word.” Anything but!




Shaped like “the caress of a lover’s fingers”, this vibrator includes two arms, one to massage your clitoris and another to stimulate the G-spot. This dual-action sensation creates a “blended climax,” according to LELO. “After cervical cancer with chemo, radiation and brachytherapy you strongly believe that your feelings of pleasure and orgasms are over. Not with the Ina Wave,” says reviewer Cecilia.



This egg-shaped device stimulates your clitoris during solo play, and can also be nestled between you and your partner during sex. Its eight stimulation patterns will help you “explore endless pleasure,” LELO says. LILY 2 comes in three colors, all with different scents: Lavender & Manuka Honey, Rose & Wisteria, and Bordeaux & Chocolat. It may be small and discreet, but boy, this device is powerful!

Read More…

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