It’s darn challenging for many FOFs today, trying to determine what we should or shouldn’t do for our grown kids, at least financially.
Let them continue to live at home, rent free, till they find “meaningful” work?
Supplement their income if they’re working but getting meager wages?
Buy them a home of their own, if we can afford it?
Pay for their vacations?
Pay for graduate school?
Help pay for our grandkids’ schooling?
But we’ll let the hundreds of Internet sages, gurus, experts and bloggers give you advice on that complicated front. Instead, we thought that we’d weigh in on the little things in life we can do for our “big kids,” especially those that don’t cost us a dime. Too often we lose sight of them while we’re brooding about the big picture.
A couple of our tips are designed to be used on younger big kids (say 19-25); a couple are more in line with older big kids (say 26-40), and a couple more relate to kids of all ages. Even though they’re all grown up, they’re still our babies!
Here are seven simple ways to let them know
that you’ll never stop being “Mom.”
1. Surprise them with baked goods. Even if they’re out of college, they’ll always appreciate that “care package” of brownies, baked by mom! And, if you’ve never mixed flour and water, give them a gift package from the best bakery in town.
2. Help them do their taxes. This is something they don’t learn in college. You’ve probably figured out some tricks over the years, so lend a helping hand if they need it.
3. Care for their kids (a.k.a. your grandkids) when you can. Whether it’s driving them to school or taking them away for the weekend, your help is a big stress-reliever for any parent.
4. E-mail them photos every now and then. Whether you believe it or not, your kids like to know that you’re safe and sound (and having some fun without them)!
5. Let them bring up their dating lives. It’s better than you blatantly digging for information!
6. Kick them out. If your adult kid is still living at home several years out of school, give him or her a hard move-out date. They’ll thank you later for the “tough love.”
7. Give your support. Whether they are stressed about something or going through a tough breakup, let him know you’re always there to talk.
How do you help out
your adult kids?