DrupalWomenQ-#8657

I believe in celebrating life and love. I am getting married this year. It will be less than 30 closest family & friends. The connection & love we have is what I wish for everyone. I want to create a lovely, meaningful and fun ceremony & reception. Any ideas that I haven’t heard a thousand times?

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26 Answers

  1. Amber Lear wrote on :

    Thank you to everyone. It is like a sieve, filtering until it all works almost perfectly.
    If you have any other ideas, feel free to add them. Kisses….

    Reply
  2. JoAnn Josemans wrote on :

    Just remember that it is your day and enjoy your celebration of love. Sometimes when you have big planned events, you get pulled around for photos,etc and don’t have time to enjoy why you are really there. Just have fun!

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      I totally agree regarding enjoying your own wedding day. I think that is part of why creating something lovely and fun matters to me, because HE matters to me. People seem to get too caught up in the traditional responsibilities of the day that they miss why they are there.
      Thanks

      Reply
  3. Patricia Assanowicz wrote on :

    first i have been to quit a few weddings and some in the family, one problem i see is when the two of you let everyone know you are getting married there are always a few, in my case in-laws that had to step in and try to run the entire wedding, everyone got so stressed out, i finally had enough, the wedding was for my neice, her first wedding and she told me how she wanted HER and her soon to be husbands wedding to go, she became so stressed out because of the in-laws, nothing she was saying to them seemed to matter, then here comes the in house fighting, i got tired of seeing my neice crying in the bedroom, i went out to the pool area, it was at my sisters home in Fla. everyone was around tables and everyone had these ideas that did not include what my neice and her soon to be wanted, i stood up and said, ok, listen to me for a second here we have a soon to be bride crying her eyes out because of you, this is her wedding and you all were invited to the wedding, no one here except her mom and dad and myslef and her best friends were “asked” to help plan, i want everyone to put their ideas, papers, pens, whatever away and please mind your business, my neice and her soon to be hubby are taking over, she will let the ones involved know what we need to do, she came out and we went to lunch and she and chris told us they want a beach wedding at night, gave us what she wanted us to do, we told her and chris to take time for yourselves and i went back to talk to the in-laws and the rest of the crew. to make YOUR wedding what you and your soon to be want, take control immediatly, give the closest people you want to plan, give cameras at all tables, ones that you drop off to develop, hey they made take photos you will not have, if you have a band or a DJ make sure the music has different types of music, fun songs, love songs for the two of you, have the kids be a part also, maybe there is a song the kids can sing for you two have it video taped of course, maybe by two people that know how to use the video, i have seen the mistakes, let NO ONE try to control your wedding, believe me it can turn into a nightmare, this way no one feels left out, let people know you have your own wedding under control. make your kiss a kiss to remember, maybe he can lean you back and give you a beautiful kiss, make the reception fun yet also romantic, definatly be creative, read some wedding books, the fun ones, there are alot of things you can incorporate into your wedding, i went on “youtube” for my neice for fun wedding videos and we got some great ideas, good luck and all of my Blessings to the both of you, make this wedding a part of the two of you, its your day dont let anyone take control. i know this is all over the place but believe me taking control in the beginning and watching some fun videos on youtube could put alot of laughs and romance into your wedding.

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      I love your thoughts “make your kiss a kiss to remember”! And I love youtube but hadn’t thought about it.
      Thanks

      My first marriage we went to the Caribbean and got married because my mother refused to sit next to my father blah blah blah, so I know about letting someone ruin it. I am pretty good and table settings, dinner parties, etc., but this has been a bit harder because it means so much more. For my part, I am only inviting my children, my parents, my best friend of 34 years and her husband, and my siblings and their spouses. No nieces or nephews and their children because of drama, drinking, just not showing up, and also to keep costs down. I want only peace and love and joy for this celebration.

      Reply
  4. Karen Smith wrote on :

    My second wedding was also an intimate gathering. One of my fondest memories today is the tablecloth we had our guests create – we brought fabric markers, Sharpies and other permanent makers and asked everyone to autograph the cloth, which was on the biggest table. We told them they could write anything, or draw something, whatever. From the oldest (my husband’s grandmother) to the youngest (my 3-year old nephew) everyone wrote and illustrated the cloth. We use it regularly and always smile when it’s on the table!

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      That is fun! Which gives me a lot of ideas swirling in my head. Perhaps decorating the cloth ourselves with poetry, his drawings, etc.. I have done a charity luncheon table setting every year for 11 years (skipped the last 2) and rubber stamped the Eiffel Tower on linen napkins so they looked vintage. More ideas keep coming.
      Thanks

      Reply
  5. Amber Lear wrote on :

    Me again, with a bit more info.
    We live in the Central Valley in California, 2 hours from Yosemite, Carmel, San Francisco, in 3 directions. There is not much here. Am looking possibly into a covered bridge in Knights Ferry for the ceremony and would love the old abandoned mill building for the reception. Cost is a factor and the mill is probably condemned but would be wonderful with candles, fairy lights and billowing fabric.
    Also, I don’t want his side/my side. Probably in a circle of candles in vases, with crystals and flowers hanging above the area.
    Obviously I like different and a bit funky.
    He is 3/4 Seminole so I would love to have the ceremony performed in the language by an elder but Seminoles are native to Florida and Oklahoma.
    It is strange that I am asking for ideas because I can do this for someone else quite easily. But there is so little original info on the web for 2nd weddings.
    Basically I want the reception to be a killer dinner party. We have considered a few notes of music fading into The Chicken Dance for our first dance as a surprise just to break the ice. Even thought about doing a Masquerade theme. And I have seen tall cylinder vases with a couple inches of water and a few long stemmed flowers set loosely inside, one color and flower type and different types in each vase for tables along with using the tall white religous candles ($1.49 each). Beautiful, casual and affordable.
    We are probably marrying in the fall.

    Reply
    • Debbie Martin wrote on :

      Amber, I love your ideas–locations, decor, culture, flowers… All sound lovely. I have seen seating in a circle before and it is wonderful. Also, with so few people, you could have one long table with 15 people on each side (we did that for my 3rd wedding and it was beautiful) and everyone feels they are part of your experience. If your Mill is unsafe to be inside, what about using it as a backdrop and do your draping from it and using twinkle lights (for safety) and putting lots of candles on the table(s)?

      Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      Nice idea about using the mill as a background.
      Thanks

      Reply
  6. Dindy904 wrote on :

    It is difficult to advise you with so little information…since personally I like semi formal ..old fashioned affairs..I would have my ceremony at the time which would allow me to have a reception consisting of a high tea with champagne…lots of roses and lily of the valley and violas. I would find lovely vintage hand worked table cloths and napkins…unmatched…I would have piano or violins playing..I would also ask each guest in advance of the event to write their special wish for your new lfe together..and to be prepared to give their wish to you verbally at the reception.

    Flowers in your hair and a lovely vintage in style dess.

    This style event could take place anywhere, at any time of year ! Whatever you do plan, enjoy all the special moments…and my very best wishes ! 🙂

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      I especially like the part about each guest and their special wish.
      Thanks

      Reply
  7. Paula Nelson wrote on :

    Involve one and all in the ceremony in some way. At my parent’s 50th wedding anniversary, we had everyone write something on the return cards and we posted where they could be read by the guests as they came in. We also invited everyone to share a special moment that they had with our parents at the party. It was truly a beautiful time.

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      Love the thought of involving everyone. I will work on this.
      Thanks

      Reply
  8. Debbie Martin wrote on :

    Please give us a little more to go on. If you’d be so kind as to tell us where you live, what you and your fiancé enjoy doing together, and what kinds of ideas have you heard that you find boring, we might be able to offer more suggestions.

    Reply
  9. Marcia Reed wrote on :

    We chose a song that we both loved (Faith Hill’s version of the Bruce Springsteen “If I Fall Behind, Wait for Me”. My husband sang it to me as I approached the stage for our ceremony…priceless!

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      Because he is 3/4 Seminole we are considering Native American flutes, drums and chants for the ceremony.

      Reply
  10. Orelle Jackson wrote on :

    I echo Rokinrobin’s thoughts – be yourself. I hosted a small wedding for my cousin at my home. They met at a dinner party at my home so that had great significance to them and most of the guests have at one time or another been to dinner at my home. That made it feel really intimate. I think when the choices you and your husband make are personal and meaningful it shows and everyone feels connected. My cousin and I are from South Africa (bride is from US) so we did little things to reflect his heritage that were really subtle but meaningful – eg the cake topper was a handmade wire and bead heart I brought back from South Africa, and the flowers in the church and on some tables were proteas (South African national flower). Guests noticed these details and if they were from South Africa it touched them and if they weren’t, it started conversations and that’s always good. A wedding guest remarked to me that she had never been to a wedding where you really felt you were there for both bride and groom even if you knew one more than the other. Another thing we did that guests with kids liked, was we turned the basement living room into a kids zone. We had board games, kid friendly DVDs, etc and we set up kid snacks – gold fish crackers, homemade PB&J sandwiches and fruit. The kids were dancing up a storm and playing even though several of them had never met. Sorry this is not specific, but I hope it helps. I wish you everything of the best. If you want more specifics on food, decor, etc. please send me a message.

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      He is 3/4 Seminole so we are probably using Native American music for the ceremony and hope to find and elder to perform it in native language.
      Thanks

      Reply
  11. Jyl Ferris wrote on :

    Without knowing more about you, or where you live, it’s hard to narrow suggestions. The great thing is that you have a small amount of people which allows you more options. You can choose to marry in a park, on a boat, your favorite restaurant (I’d choose a private room like a wine cellar with a long table), or even at home. You can forgo things like garters, guest books, cake toppers and placecards. You can make your invitations by hand. Get loosely arranged flowers and wear a dress that’s not necessarily designed for brides. Congratulations!

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      I like forgoing the traditional things that may not matter to us. He does want a garter for me, ha ha, so I get to splurge and get a great one and I am not throwing a bouquet but will carry flowers of some sort. I saw tall cylinder vases with a couple inches of water and a few long stemmed flowers set loosely inside, one color and flower type and different types in each vase. Beautiful, casual and affordable.
      Thanks

      Reply
  12. Marcia Robinson wrote on :

    Since I don’t know what you’ve heard a thousand times, it’s a little difficult for me to answer. But, what I would do is to try and find a restaurant that has a private room that will work with you regarding your menu. You can dress up the restaurant with flowers, candles, etc.

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      Everyone seems to marry at wineries so I considered a brewery for fun.
      Thanks

      Reply
  13. Robin Richards wrote on :

    Not sure if you heard this one or not, but here goes. Plan something that is unique to the relationship that your and your fiance share together. What is it about the two of you do you want to share with your wedding guests? For example, me and my husband created a unique wedding invitation that gave definitions of our first names and posted them side by side on the front of the invitation. Our wedding cake topper was two crystal swans facing each other. It’s your wedding. What about it do you want to make memorable? Be fearless and creative.

    Reply
    • Amber Lear wrote on :

      I love “be fearless and creative”!
      Thanks

      Reply
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