“Whether you’re 18 or 81, the desire to be desirable never goes away.”

I paused to think about the statement, above, when I noticed it today at the end of an email from a beauty company. Considering the source, I assume it’s meant to imply that we’ll still want to be attractive, beautiful, gorgeous, appealing or striking –in the physical sense—when we’re 81. I’d prefer it to mean that we’ll want to feel needed—in the emotional and intellectual—sense.

Ingenue Katherine Hepburn

Clinically speaking, I’m not as physically desirable at 64 as I was at 44, when I was a svelte size 8; had a head of thick, curly hair; toned arms and a glowing complexion, sans wrinkles, lines and crow’s feet. No matter how hard we try, we’re just not going to look 40 when we’re 60. And it’s a pretty safe bet that we won’t look 60 when we’re 80.I do think, though, that I’m more desirable, in other ways, than I was two decades ago.  I’m less angry, annoyed and agitated, critical and anxious. (Note to my friends and family: I said “less.”)

When the people I love look at me in twenty years (If I’m here to be looked at), I hope they’ll see passion, humor, caring, generosity, creativity, style, and energy. At the end of the day, those things are far more attractive than a full head of hair and a hot body.

FOF Katherine









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4 Responses to ““Whether you’re 18 or 81, the desire to be desirable never goes away.””

  1. Kate Line Snider says:

    PS. I forgot to adress the being needed idea. This is a good thought; however, with all my kids- now grown – I got over that.

  2. Kate Line Snider says:

    We all long to be beautiful and desirable!. There is a whole industry banking on this. I add some thoughts below.

    First- and I wish you’d write a blog about this- why is it that middle- aging women who ignore their bodies persist in coloring their hair?

    I’m over sixty and went the gray route long ago. I marvel that I still get hit on (mostly by even older gentlemen who blatantly ignore my somewhat younger husband, who always walks ahead of me.) I wouldn’t give any of these men the time of day, but it is nonetheless flattering, and, I might add, I believe this attention is due to good foundation concealer, good genes and even better bras.

    My mother-in-law, spiritually beautiful at 84, is arthritic and can barely get around. She is additionally burdened by a seriously ill spouse, also 84. One of her MAJOR priorities , however, is getting her hair “done”! She also never leaves the house without some makeup. I just love this!

  3. Cecile says:

    BRAVO!!!!!! Love this editorial!!! Right on target! I am passing it on to all my FOF friends!

    Like Geri, I, too, am less anxious, critical, and agitated than I was twenty years ago… Bonus! 🙂

    Wonderful, insightful Kate… Indeed FOF Hall of Fame!!

    Thank you Geri for this uplifting message.

    I am going to print it; post it and read it daily!

    Have a great day, everybody!


  4. Sylvia says:

    Totally agree! I’m 45 now (with wrinkles already mind you) but I’m starting to feel more stylish and more beautiful for the reasons you mentioned above. When I sometimes feel ‘old’ I remind myself how young I would think I was when I’m going to be 65. Still so much to do and learn!


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