Love is sex, religion and color blind

No matter how much you love the gay couples on Modern Family, Brothers & Sisters or The Kids Are All Right, and no matter how progressive you believe you are, how would you really feel if your son or daughter announced he/she was marrying a person of the same sex?

Mitchell, left, and Cameron in Modern Family
Real-life Heidi and Seal

I’d be just fine, as long as my child’s partner was a wonderful person.  I’d rather my daughter be with someone else’s wonderful daughter than with someone else’s lousy son.

As I watched FOFs Annette Bening and Julianne Moore play a long-married, gay couple in The Kids Are All Right, I thought how natural it felt to me when they were lying in bed together, sitting with their kids at the dinner table or cuddling up on the sofa to watch a movie.

Real-life Ellen and Portia

When I woke my mother to tell her about my first date with my former husband, 43 years ago, she asked: “Is he Jewish?” Parents back in the day thought a marriage stood a better chance of being successful if the couple was the same religion.  If I had wanted to marry someone of a different religion, it would have displeased my folks.  Yet, a decade later, when my younger sister married an Irish Catholic boy, my mom and dad welcomed him with open arms. Her marriage succeeded. Mine didn’t, even though Douglas and I were the same religion.

My daughter’s boyfriend is black. Although my mother and father would have had joint heart attacks if I brought home a black boyfriend four decades ago, my mom liked her granddaughter’s choice.  When I look at Noel, I don’t see a color. I see the man Simone loves.

As far as I’m concerned, all that matters in a successful relationship is mutual respect, love and commitment.  If the person in the world who brings you the most joy has the same anatomy or a different color skin, go for it. Besides, it’s no one else’s business but yours.

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3 Responses to “Love is sex, religion and color blind”

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  2. Deborah Milne says:

    Geri so perfectly written. My family was very much the same as yours. My first husband was required to ‘join’ the Lutheran Church before we married. That didn’t help so much with our success either did it? / :

    I agree with you implacably. I would much rather my children be loved & to love a good..honorable person than an opposite sex schmuck. I know you’d agree that life is too short and love is what is really counts; true love.

    Don’t we wish most people felt this way?

    I love your posts that make me think!!

    Have a tremendous afternoon Geri, it was such a pleasure to speak with you today. I felt like I’ve known you forever x

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  3. sharon segal says:

    Dear Geri, Hi! I agree with you. Who cares as along as they are happy. In any relationship with out respect , love and commitment you show him or her the door. Do not forget to change the locks. Stay well. Sharon

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