The self-promoting, “celebrity” divorce lawyer, Raoul Felder, has written a book, The Good Divorce. I’m not sure what sage advice he imparts, but I can offer my own advice in five words: Act like humans, not animals. (By the way, a book by the same name was written by a woman 17 years ago.)
Douglas and I got married at 21, “unofficially” separated at 41 and officially divorced at 51. We didn’t own real estate together or have original Ming vases and Picasso paintings, so there was nothing to cause potential problems on that end. But we had two children together and we weren’t going to fight over them.
As a matter of fact, Douglas and I acted civilly to one another from the day we separated. After he had brain surgery, I stayed with him. When his parents were in an automobile accident in Scottsdale, Arizona, his mother stayed with me and Edgar while his dad was in the hospital. (Coincidentally, Edgar and I were at his condo in Arizona at the time.)
Douglas and I celebrated important events together, including our kids’ high school and college graduations. We brought our son to college together and set him up in his room. To this day, Douglas and I are “family.” He is part of our Thanksgiving celebration at my sister’s house. He comes to dinner at David’s and my apartment. We play Scrabble, just like we did when we were married. (THAT we fight over.)
It’s pathetic how many people have acrimonious divorces. They were so in love when they married. Love turns to hate. Most divorce lawyers add fuel to the fire, Raoul Felder included, book or no book. But if you must read a book about The Good Divorce, I’d go for the one by FOF Constance.