My first thought in almost any situation is one based in fear, I think the worst things first. It’s as simple as if someone says they’re going to be home at a certain time and they’re late, I immediately picture some horrible accident rather than they are just running lte, to everything bad that I hear on the news, I immediately picture happening to someone I love..I live my life from a place of fear. How can I reprogram or train my brain to not go to the fearful place first?
0 Answers
Mike Halsey wrote on :
Thanks for posting this Pamela, because what you describe is an epidemic, and this constant fight/flight response damages our emotional, physical and relationship health in countless ways. The good news? You can start to permanently change this habitual suffering right NOW.
I’d suggest starting with a two-part strategy:
1. Recognize where the fear reflex comes from–the ancient little brain core which expects a saber-toothed tigers around every corner–and placing all faith instead in your amazing modern forebrain which is infinitely more powerful and and intelligent. The lizard brain will always be faster, but the big human brain can learn to quickly heard it back into a safe cage by realizing how utterly ridiculous and useless worrying is.
2. Practice mindfulness: Learn to sit with whatever thoughts or feelings are passing through you without judging or reacting. Notice how they come and go, but that they are not YOU and are not very real or permanent at all. You won’t explode, and you will be teaching your whole brain that you and the world really are OK in any given instant. If a situation DOES arise which requires you to act, you will act much more effectively.
Worry is a pernicious habit, but just a habit. It isn’t you, and it is not by any means a necessary fact of life.
Good luck!
😀
Mike
Homework suggestion: For one week, notice every time a fear or worry arises and name it. Put a sticky note on your wall or computer naming it. Periodically check in with this “master fear list” and *decide* who is going to be in charge of your present moments–your life’s happiness. Will it be you, or the sticky notes?
Rosanne Leslie wrote on :
Try to remember what you can control in your life and what you cannot: your thoughts and your actions belong to you. Worry serves no purpose at all. If there is a situation that you can assist with by taking action in preventing something bad from happening, then I would try to do that, otherwise, remind yourself that instead of something bad happening, something good might occur as well.
We all worry about the “what could’s in life and the what if’s”, but it never does anything to benefit us or others. Reprograming our minds takes a great deal of time and courage. It is an every day challenge, but if you are earnest you will be able to retrain your thoughts from negative/fear based to positive. First you must recognize the thought for what it is–just a thought. A thought can become a thing, positive or negative if it is supported by deep feeling. Cancel out the bad thoughts and welcome in the good. Support the happy thoughts with love and you will begin to see your energy shift for the better…
hope that helps a bit…
Lorna Gager wrote on :
Hi Pamela. I used to do the same thing! But now I understand that I don’t have any control over what is going to happen to other people or world events. When I go to the “bad place” I remind myself that I am telling myself a story. I can make the story a good one or a bad one–my choice. So now I choose to devise a good story, or better yet, wait it out and see what really happens. Up to now, no worst case scenario has played out and I have a much more peaceful existence. Try to catch yourself in the negative though pattern and remind yourself that you can think a good outcome just as easily as a poor one. I know it can help you feel better. Good luck.