I spent my 40s having uninhibited sex with E, a man from Mississippi (yes, Mississippi!) 14 years my senior. Thrilling sex. Sex that made me see stars – literally. Sex in all kinds of positions. Sometimes sex three times a night. Long drawn-out sex. Speedy sex. Sober sex. Inebriated sex.  No toys. No chains, whips and blindfolds. Just me and E. Up until our first sexual union I couldn’t have even imagined sex could be so intoxicating, 

E died 12 years after we met, when I was 53 years old. Although my sex life didn’t die with him, sex with new men didn’t come close to being as exciting.  I didn’t care. I had left corporate America two years before to launch my own business, an all-consuming endeavor.  

Then, year by year, sex has played a smaller and smaller role in my life. It’s not a big ticket in the lives of many of my FOFriends, either, whether or not they’re married. 

A vibrator is an acceptable stand in for E, even if it doesn’t have a southern accent. Frankly, the thought of having sex with an older man who doesn’t look like Liam Neeson isn’t especially appealing. Besides, it’s doubtful Liam would fancy my current physique. 

Enough about me. Let’s talk about you. If your interest in sex is diminishing weekly – but it distresses you – I know just the man who can help.

His name is Dr. James Simon, a prominent reproductive endocrinologist and certified sexuality counsellor in Washington, D.C. who has been called the “Menopause Whisperer” by Washingtonian Magazine. And, he’s just received the Distinguished Service Award from the International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health, which recognizes an individual’s dedication and commitment to the fields of women’s sexual medicine and health.

As Dr. Simon treated women in their mid-40s who were fatalistically accepting their declining libidos, he was determined to step forward. That was 25 years ago, when he opened IntimMedicine Specialists, his Washington, D.C. practice.  

Now a preeminent authority on treating sexual, menopausal, and complicated gynecological problems, Dr. Simon explains there are “biological, sociological and psychological approaches to understanding low sexual desire and bringing couples closer together, rather than allowing them to drift apart.” 

What’s more, “women who have successful intimate relationships, including sex, are less likely to have sleep problems or other medical problems, and even live longer,” he asserts.

Since 1996, Dr. Simon has helped thousands of women, men and couples understand their waning sexual interest and take action to reverse it. “Women feel diminishing sexual desire is a fait accompli of aging, and nothing can be done about it,” he adds. “When it is exacerbated by menopausal symptoms, sexual pain, and fear of hormones, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. If neglected, additional social and inter-relational issues predominate, making treatment far more complex.” 

The availability of pornography has had both positive and negative effects on sexual relationships, Dr, Simon believes. “It’s opened our eyes to new types of sexual encounters, which can help couples renew their sexual satisfaction. On the downside, explicit sexuality on the internet can raise unrealistic expectations,” he adds, “Patients ask me, ‘Why is sex so short?’ when they see it last an hour online,” he chuckles.

Dr. Simon and I have become friends, and we’re working together on an exciting initiative for mid age women – which we’ll announce later in the year. We’ve never discussed my sex life, but I’m certain that his intelligence, experience, wonderfully soothing style – teamed with his incredible ability to listen – will do wonders for yours.

You don’t have to live in Washington, D.C. or visit Dr. Simon’s office. Schedule a Zoom session and you’ll probably call him the “Menopause Whisperer,” too. You can reach Dr. Simon at 202-293-1000.

A new guilt-free, great-tasting nutritious drink to help us stay physically active and mentally alert 

Celery stalks and carrot sticks have never been my go to snacks. I’m more of a chocolate bar and popcorn kind of gal. Sadly, I often get carried away – then sulky when I invariably gain weight. 

My kitchen is 15 feet from the living room, where I work. And, ever since Covid began nine months ago, snacks and sulks have pretty much become the orders of the day for me. 

The timing couldn’t have been better to try a new plant-based nutrition drink – Perennial Daily Gut & Brain – that’s crafted especially for the FabOverFifty generation.  The name may not be romantic, but I love what the ingredients of this “mini meal” are doing for my body. And I love its pure, rich chocolatey taste and smooth milk-like consistency, even though it doesn’t have a drop of dairy.  

Perennial is packed with 8 grams of plant-based protein, including pea, rice and non-gmo soy protein; 5 grams of prebiotic fiber; 11 essential vitamins and minerals, including Vitamin B12, B6, D3 and E, and folate, and Algae oil – a valuable source of essential Omega-3 fats.  

Thoughtfully blended into a tasty and convenient drink, these super healthy ingredients perform two essential tasks as we age: 1) Feed and stimulate the growth of healthy bacteria in our digestive system so the nutrients in our food are properly absorbed and converted into energy, a key function for longevity. 2) Help us stay mentally focused with a unique and nourishing nutrient complex to support brain health.

Interestingly, our gut and brain are actually connected by a major nerve called the vagus. When our digestive system metabolizes food, chemicals are released that talk to our brain to boost our mood and reduce inflammation. The antioxidants and prebiotics in a glass of  refreshing Perennial also help support our vitally important immune health.

“Nutrient absorption is one of our key pillars, and we wanted each vitamin and mineral in Perennial to enhance the absorption of another. This ensures that they stay in our bodies and increase our energy,” explained Sara Bonham, a food science expert who conceived and formulated Perennial.  

Our bodies experience many changes as we age, such as a decrease in digestive enzymes, which can lead to issues including lactose intolerance and bloating. Plant-based Perennial is lactose and cholesterol free but fills in food gaps we may develop. 

>> Order Perennial. For today’s modern adults. Enter code 20FABOVER50 at checkout for 20% OFF. 

I grab a Perennial when I crave a mid-morning snack to tide me over until lunch, or for physical and mental boosts at around  3 pm. It’s satisfying, low in carbs, and does a whole lot more for my body than chocolate or popcorn.  It also comes  in vanilla, which is great in a smoothie or icy cold over Grape Nuts, my fave cereal. Nice for my weight, too, since it’s low in sugar and only 140 calories. 

The compact 8-ounce package slips into my purse, and I keep one in the car. Shelf stable, it stays fresh for a really long time.

Formerly involved in food development for giants like General Mills and Mars, Sara felt no one was championing the health of today’s older adults who are aging better than prior generations. Sara knows that we’re still working, starting our own businesses, and striving, And, we want to stay at the top of our game as we age.

Sara says her 60-something, working mom is Perennial’s perfect target customer. “She cares about staying mentally sharp and active. Physical and brain health are both important to her,” Sara said. 

Perennial was born from Sara’s inspiration to help people like her mom to live their best lives and give them a new sense of freedom. “We’re a human health science company dedicated to targeted plant-based nutrition for today’s modern 50+ adults,” she said. 

Enter code 20FABOVER50 at checkout for 20% OFF Perennial Daily Gut & Brain Sample Pack from January 8 (12:01 am) until January 31 2021  (11:59 pm). One time only.

AgeUp compensated FOF to write this sponsored post. Regardless, we recommend only products or services that we believe will be helpful for our readers. All insights and expressed opinions are our own. —Geri Brin

My friend Linda plans to sell her New York co-op and move to a community living residence, but she’s worried her nest egg won’t last if she lives well into her 90s. Now 87 years old, Linda wishes the new AgeUp product had been available years ago to give her a supplemental income if she’s fortunate to live as long as her mom. “I’ve been independent my whole life, and I don’t want to turn to my daughter to help support me,” she said.

Available to any of us between 50 and 75 years old, AgeUp converts small monthly payments into greater – and guaranteed – monthly payouts once we reach a selected age between 91 and 100. Your monthly payment can be as low as $25, which makes AgeUp financially accessible. 

Think about it this way: Life insurance is based on the small probability that someone will die prematurely, and can help prevent the family left behind from becoming financially strapped. AgeUp addresses the other extreme, providing income when you live much longer than expected. These additional funds can help enable a higher quality of life and greater financial freedom – something that all of us desire in our later years. 

Consider that one out of every three Baby Boomers who are now 65 years old will live until at least age 90, and one out of seven will live until age 95, according to the Social Security Administration. While AgeUp is available to men and women, women would benefit the most as we’re more likely to live longer. AgeUp will help make sure we’re financially prepared so we can enjoy those extra years comfortably.

And how nice to be able to relieve our adult children of a possible burden. According to a survey conducted by AgeUp, a whopping 68 percent of millennials expect to provide financial contributions to their parents should they outlive their retirement savings. That means us! By planning for extended longevity now, we can set ourselves up to live the lifestyle that we want once we reach our 90s and beyond – one where we have our own resources and aren’t dependent on our children or family members for financial support. 

“We created AgeUp for physically healthy people in their 50s to early 70s who have longevity in their families and have a reasonable chance of living very, very long lives,” said Blair Baldwin, general manager. “My grandparents were financially comfortable, but my grandfather and grandmother needed years of in-home care in their later years, which can get quite expensive.” A product like AgeUp can help offset some of these costs, providing a recipient with a guaranteed income stream that lasts for the rest of her lifetime, plus the flexibility to spend the money as she chooses, with no restrictions or claims to file. 

HOW AGEUP WORKS 

➩ First, you choose your monthly payment, which can be as low as $25 and as high as $250 a month. “Lots of people are choosing the $250 option, many more than I would have suspected,” Baldwin told me.

➩ Second, you decide when you want your payouts to begin – called the “payout” age – and whether or not you want your money returned to your beneficiaries if you die before the payout age. 

Choosing “yes” guarantees that you’ll get back at least what you put in, no matter what. If you die before your target payout age, 100% of the premiums you’ve paid to that point will be returned to your beneficiary. However, your payouts will be smaller if you do reach your target payout age.

If you choose “no” for the “death before payout age” option, there’s no return if you die before payouts begin. There’s a chance you could lose your premium payments, but your payouts will be larger if you live to your target payout age.

If you reach the payout age but pass away shortly thereafter, your money will be returned to a beneficiary until they receive the total amount that you had contributed. 

➩ You can start, stop or change the amount you pay at any time.

Here’s an example¹ of what a 55-year-old woman could receive at different payout ages if she makes payments of $25 per month:

Unlike long term care insurance, which is really expensive, can have a coverage limit, and must be spent on medical costs, AgeUp is a low cost product with unrestricted use. You can use your monthly payouts however you choose, helping you to enjoy the financial autonomy that you’re accustomed to in your later years.

“Our goal is to give you the most bang for your buck,” Baldwin stressed.

IS AGEUP RIGHT FOR YOU?

To determine your own estimated monthly payouts based on your current age, gender, monthly payments, payout age and return of premiums, visit the AgeUp website and click “Get an estimate.” From here, you’ll answer a few questions and then use the AgeUp calculator to adjust your monthly payments, payout age, and return of premium option. 

Should you have questions or need assistance, AgeUp offers customer support via online chat or email, or you can schedule a call to speak with a team member. There’s also a robust FAQ page and a detailed product snapshot available on the AgeUp website.

We don’t know what the future holds, but AgeUp can provide peace of mind if you think that you may live an exceptionally long life and will need additional financial resources to lead the lifestyle that you want. Here’s to you and your longevity! 

Sponsorship Disclosure

AgeUp is issued and backed by MassMutual, and sold by Haven Life Insurance Agency, a MassMutual-owned innovation hub. MassMutual has been in business since 1851 and is rated A++ for financial strength by A.M. Best². For additional information, visit our website or check out our frequently asked questions.

AgeUp is a Deferred Income Annuity (ICC19DTCDIA) issued by Massachusetts Mutual Life Insurance Company (MassMutual), Springfield, MA 01111 and offered exclusively through Haven Life Insurance Agency, LLC. Contract and rider form numbers and features may vary by state and may not be available in all states. Our Agency license number in Arkansas is 100139527.